Товариськість вашої дитини важливіше, ніж оцінки в школі! Ось 5 причин, чому

Батьки зазвичай дуже хвилюються, коли діти вперше йдуть до школи.

«Чи зможе малюк читати потрібну кількість слів за хвилину?», Або «Як навчити його рахувати до 500?».

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Але незабаром багато батьків з подивом дізнаються, що важливіше для дитини не навчання, а його соціальні навички. І вони дають більш відчутний результат у дорослому житті.

“Наприклад, дослідження, опубліковане в 2015 році, показало, що навіть при відмінному сімейному анамнезі і ранніх академічних здібностях саме соціальні навички, що розвинулися в дитячому саду, виявилися пов’язані з благополуччям у віці 25 років”.

Незалежно від того, наскільки добре діти читали і рахували, або скільки грошей заробляли їхні батьки, саме ті з них, які продемонстрували соціальні навики, закінчили середню школу, поїхали в коледж, влаштувалися на роботу і уникли в’язниці.

Хоча багато батьків і школа хочуть скоротити час ігор і соціальну взаємодію, щоб витратити більше часу на навчання, це насправді ті необхідні «м’які навички», які є найбільш важливими для майбутнього успіху.

1. Як вміти грати з іншими.

Гра – потужний каталізатор розвитку в перші роки. Граючи з іншими, діти вчаться вести переговори, вирішувати проблеми, ділитися і експериментувати. Ви можете допомогти своїй дитині сформувати ці навички, витративши час на безкоштовну гру з іншими дітьми.

У той час як танці, футбол і балет можуть мати свою цінність, діти потребують більшої кількості часу, витраченого на неструктуровану гру з іншими дітьми.

2. Як вирішувати проблему.

Ми, батьки, вміємо вирішувати проблеми, тому що у нас була велика практика! Багато навичок необхідні для виживання, тому нашим дітям потрібна частина цієї практики.

Отже наступного разу, коли у вашої дитини виникне проблема, запропонуйте їй взяти участь в процесі її рішення.

Попросіть малюка описати проблему, провести аналіз і спробувати вирішити її.

Ви як і раніше будете активним учасником процесу, але замість того, щоб все вирішувати самостійно, дозвольте вашій дитині спробувати самостійно впоратися з проблемою, запитавши: «Як ти думаєш, що потрібно зробити?»

Навчання дитини вирішення проблем також означає, що ми вчимо їх, як переживати невдачі і повторювати спроби, що є ще одним важливим «м’яким умінням».

Коли ми запитуємо дітей, як вони приймали рішення, ми даємо їм можливість оцінити їх досвід і при необхідності внести необхідні поліпшення. Ми вчимо їх, що помилки допомагають нам вчитися і рухатися вперед.

3. Як маркувати і розпізнавати почуття.

Діти, сприйнятливі до емоцій навколо них, здатні добре ладити з іншими. Ви можете сприяти цій майстерності, звернувши увагу на емоційні сигнали і називаючи емоції.

Ви можете розвивати це вміння не тільки вдома ( «Я зараз дивлюся на обличчя твого брата, і я не думаю, що йому весело», або «Ви виглядали такими щасливими, коли ви перемогли, ваші посмішки були як лазерний промінь!»), Але також просити розповідати про емоції ( «Як ти думаєш, що він відчував, коли це сталося?»).

Історії повинні бути наповнені конфліктами і емоціями – часто це приводить в рух сюжет. Розмови про емоції, які ви бачите обговорювати легше, тому що ваша дитина не бере участі в неспокійних подіях. Так вони можуть стати більш уважними до емоцій, а потім застосовувати їх розуміння в реальному житті.

Дослідження показують, що надмірне використання гаджетів може перешкодити здібності дитини розпізнавати емоції у інших. Тому переконайтеся, що ваші діти багато часу грають і взаємодіють з іншими людьми, а не з пікселями.

4. Як бути корисним.

Діти повинні думати не тільки про себе, а й усвідомлювати потреби інших. Відзначаючи і доповнюючи дитину, коли вона намагається бути корисною, ви заохочуєте її продовжувати.

Дайте дитині прості можливості допомогти – прибирати продукти, підготувати свіжий підгузник для дитини або допомагати брату одягнутися, – і потім будьте вдячні за допомогу.

Прищеплювати дітям важливість допомоги та послуг, і вміння бути вдячним. Це можна влаштувати у вигляді гри – діти люблять відчувати себе супергероями, допомагаючи іншим.

5. Як контролювати свої імпульси.

Імпульсне керування є частиною виконавчих функцій, спрямованих на префронтальну кору головного мозку. Ця область розвивається до настання повноліття, але деякі з найшвидших фаз розвитку відбуваються в ранньому дитинстві. Ось чому дітям потрібні можливості практикувати ці навички.

Це може виглядати як відомий зефірний експеримент, коли дитина повинна вміти відкладати задоволення і чекати. Можна тренувати ці навички в форматі гри. Ігри з рухом, які вимагають, щоб дитина зупинилася і пішла, червоне світло / зелене світло, танець і заморозка.

Діти повинні “перемикати передачі” і контролювати свої імпульси.

Гра також є відмінним способом для створення цих навичок. Обравши новий характер і cюжетну лінію, діти повинні планувати, перш ніж діяти, по черзі і слідувати правилам. Вони також практикують мислення поза своєю власною перспективою і діють так, як хочуть інші, а не просто слідують своїм власним імпульсам.

Наше суспільство, яке швидко розвивається може створити у вас враження, що дитині потрібно розвивати навчальні здібності і як можна швидше.

Однак реальність полягає в тому, що «м’які» соціальні навички, яких вони набувають в ранньому дитинстві, завдяки повільним, простим процесам гри і взаємодії зі своїми сім’ями і навколишнім світом, будуть служити їм набагато краще і набагато довше.

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